I was missing something!

I promised myself I would document my journey by starting a podcast. Little did I know, I was also documenting my healing journey—navigating confusion and watching my soul emerge into love.

Fear held me back for a long time. But when I finally let it go, I fell in love—not just with podcasting, but the process, the growth, and the deeper connections I made with myself.

Maybe you’ve noticed me smiling more. Perhaps you’ve seen my silly side or caught a glimpse of my morbid sense of humour.

It all started with my love for books, but let’s be real. There was something deeper stirring inside me, calling me to start showing up.

And then, being the person I am, I thought about death.

Not in a dark way, but in a stoic way—reflecting on life and how short it can feel. As I approached 40 and looked back on the last decade, I realized I wasn’t satisfied. I knew deep down I was full of excuses, and I was the one holding myself back.

Despite all the books I read and the therapy I invested in, I was missing something crucial in my healing process: a real connection with God. I prayed daily, fasted, and gave to charity, but none of it made me feel genuinely connected.

That is, until one day at a praise and worship service, about a month before I started the podcast, I received a message from God: “You are loved, here and now, just as you are. But it’s your mindset that’s holding you back. Your lack of faith is keeping you stuck.”

It’s one thing to pray and hope God grants us everything we desire, and sometimes those prayers are answered. But I’ve learned the hard way—you have to believe you’re worthy of the life you want and act on that belief. Faith without works is stifled faith.

I had been so hyper-focused on everything that was going wrong in my life. Loneliness weighed heavily on me, and I started to think there was something wrong with me, that maybe life wasn’t going to happen the way I’d hoped.

Allowing God to meet me where I am has been life-changing. But more than that, learning to accept and love myself isn’t just something I say—it’s something I live every day now. It’s not just about receiving God’s love; it’s about loving Him, regardless of my circumstances.

The Learning Process

The best part of starting the podcast and showing up online has been the learning. As with anything new, it comes with excitement—and burnout.

I work a full-time job, and in between that, taking care of my fitness, and maintaining balance, I spend my spare time learning. My life used to be work, home, gym. Now it’s work, edit, produce, create, interview, fitness, and rest.

I’m grateful for my rest days. There were moments when I felt burned out, and I had to adjust my schedule, taking on what I could realistically handle. I only record on certain days now, and I make sure to block out time for rest and creative rejuvenation.

One of the most exciting parts has been learning the technical side of things, like using specific programs and discovering the importance of a good mic!

The People I’ve Met

Over the past few months, I’ve connected with so many amazing people from all walks of life—successful entrepreneurs, fitness coaches, authors, Krav Maga instructors, love mentors, ministers, psychologists, fashion influencers, and more.

I used to hate social media, but now it’s part of how I show up in this new chapter of my life.

Some stories I’ve heard left me in tears; others made me stop and take a second look at my own life. Though I’m still a bit of a lone wolf, and most of my connections are online, the people I’ve met are incredible.

I’ve also discovered there are people out there who are genuinely cheering you on, willing to give advice and support. It’s a beautiful thing.

What’s Coming Up

I’ve started a series of solo dates on the island of Trinidad, where I live. Most of my dates revolve around food and desserts, but I’m open to new adventures.

A few more guests are lined up on the podcast before the year ends, along with two solo episodes. I’m excited to be starting the new year back home in Canada, and I’ll be spending some quality time there. There’s nothing like the comfort of family.

I’ve also got a new trainer, as my schedule has shifted, and my current fitness goal is to build muscle while staying mobile.

Right now, I’m pushing toward a better future while remaining grateful for the present moment.

As for my romantic life? Completely dead. Nothing, zip. But you know what? I’m totally okay with it. I used to get hung up on the idea of finding love, but after listening to countless podcasts, stories, and reading about relationships, I’m at a point where I’m no longer searching or longing for it. Sure, I have nights where I wonder if it’ll happen, but I’m no longer giving that part of my life any extra energy. It’s not that I’ve given up—it’s just that if it happens, it happens.

That’s all for now! Stay tuned for more on my journey with podcasting, YouTube, and everything books.

Be Bold. Be Creative. Be YOU!